In Mentalization, Ponder, Real Life No Gimmicks on December 9, 2010 at 13:25

Question Posed: “How do I know when to let someone go?”

We are like seasons. We change. Evolve. Mature. Trees lose their leaves as a sign of a new beginning. We lose people as we travel through life, which is often indicative of personal growth occurring (by lose I’m not referring to death). Don’t fill yourself with sorrow because of the things you lose during the changing seasons, as development comes, so will greater things. Embrace.

With that being stated… To the question posed:

This is what aids me at arriving to the conclusion of when to let someone go. I evaluate the relationship. Are we both positively benefitting from the connection? Is the relationship mentally, emotionally or physically draining? Is it progressive? Are we helping or hurting one another? Things of that nature. In the event that I feel as if I’m making this person worse, meaning they aren’t growing from our relationship and becoming a greater person, I figure, subsequently they have no use for me. That’s when I know it’s time to let them go. If they aren’t growing from me and vice versa, then it’s likely that they are stunting my growth, which means the flow of me evolving is on pause. I never want that. If the evaluation results are negative, then I, hereby, deem it necessary to remove that person from my life. Perhaps we’ll meet again, perhaps this is the end, but what’s most important is the release of this very moment.

The ultimate goal at hand is to continue to proceed with life, in a positive direction. Not speaking from expertise, merely speaking from experience. Onward and Upward. Let’s go!


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